Taxes

I know it sounds a little bit odd... but as soon as we receive our W-2's I am always SO ANXIOUS to get our taxes done. It makes Jackson laugh/slightly crazy, ha ha. So today we got all of our taxes DONE and submitted! It was such a good feeling. I think I just get that way because if there's something big I need to get done, I can't fully rest until it's completed. I also got a few decorations up for Valentine's Day. It's always so fun decorating for holidays... I just feel like time goes so fast. As soon as I get one up, it's time for the next one to be put up. Life is so interesting that way isn't it? I don't understand it, so I just try to do my best and embrace it. 

My Favorite Kind of Day

Today was one of those days that I got REALLY spoiled. Jack got me these flowers. I love them so much! He also let me get sushi. I LOVE sushi. It was delicious and exactly what I was craving. Weekends are such a breath of fresh air from the 60 hr work/school weeks. It's so nice just to spend time with Jack and relax.

Later we went down to visit these little munchkins. I know I post about them as if they were my own kids... but that's alright by me! Ha ha. I mean, come one, how could I not? They're adorable. 

Snap Chats

I'm sure many of you either use or know what Snap Chat is. I personally use it more than any other social media. It's one of my main forms of communication with my phone, ha ha. As silly and trivial as that may be, they can almost always make me laugh and make my day a little brighter. These are a couple I received today. One of cute Hadley as Harry Potter (hilarious) and one of my sis-in-law Megan who is going to have a little boy in May! I can't wait! 

Double the Fun

I got to cut Keaton's hair tonight! (Jackson't little brother.) He is seriously the cutest. I met this little guy when he was 4 or 5 years old. It's hard to believe how big he has gotten. We used to race each other behind the bleachers at Jackson's baseball games. (He would always beat me by just a hair of course.) I'd only run fast enough to win once in a great while just to tease him. It was the cutest! Now here he is so much more grown up. With this good lookin' hair cut we'll have to work hard to keep all the girls away. After I was done with his hair, my sister Heather came and got her hair done. I think it turned out so cute! We didn't end up finishing until about 9:30 pm but it was good for her to get out of the house for a bit (she spends a lot of time taking care of my crazy adorable nephew and niece Hadley and Easton) and good for me to visit with her. I love how they both turned out and I loved the visit! 

Car Wash and a Movie

Today I ran to the car wash and got a few errands done. Wednesdays I have off, but I usually end up going into work for a few hours anyways to make sure I get all 40 in. For those of you who don't know... car washes are my happy place, ha ha. I LOVE them. I don't know why... but for as long as I can remember they've been something that can put a smile on my face. Later that night, Jackson and I ended up going to Hidden Figures. It's such a good movie! I would recommend it to anyone. We stopped at Dairy Queen on our way home to get a chocolate dipped cone. I would also recommend those to anyone. 😉

Beef Stew

Jack came and got another hair cut tonight. I love when he comes to the school. It always makes me happy to do peoples' hair that I know and love! I threw together some beef stew when I got home from school tonight. It's so easy and so good! You just cut it all up, throw it in the crock pot over night, and it's all ready to go for lunches or dinner the next day. I should have gotten a picture of when it was all done. Mmm... it's so good! 

Sam Burns

We had a guest speaker at school tonight. I always love having them come. Hearing their stories, and knowing that they started out just like I did, gives me hope and helps me to know that if I keep working I can one day become like those I admire. 

Sam's story is an interesting one. In high school, he was bullied because he was gay. So much so, it got to the point that one day he walked out of high school and never went back. He decided to become a hair stylist and ended up getting involved with Paul Mitchell and became the person he is today. There's obviously a lot more to the story... so if you ever get the chance, learn more about him. He's amazing. It definitely inspired me and gave me the boost I needed to keep going on this journey. 

Sunday Fun Day

This is our new primary class. Jackson and I teach the CTR 4. These kids are HILARIOUS, have loads of energy, and take lots of patience! Ha ha. Nevertheless, we love them! After church, we made some yummy cookies. I could probably eat all of these by myself. Anyone else with me? Only joking... after like 3 I start to get sick. We went over to Jack's family's house for a bit afterwards. Then we headed out to Herriman. My step-brother Quincy is staying there for a few months until he starts his residency. It was good to see him after all this time! I'll have to get a picture with him next time I see him. 

Let it Snow

There has been SO MUCH SNOW this winter. I took this little clip from our balcony this morning. Isn't it so pretty? I love it when it's falling... but when it starts to melt and makes me cold, I'm not it's greatest fan. We also go the Christmas tree down today finally, ha ha. It was so nice to get it all packed away and just have a day to relax. Heather sent me this hilarious picture of Easton. They are too cute. We ended up going to see them for a little while that night. My dad, Kris, David, and Megan were there too. It's always a good time! 

West Valley Office

I worked in the West Valley Office today instead of the West Jordan Billing Office where I usually work. It's always good to get out of the norm and see some new faces. A really fun/sad thing happened while I was there though.

There's a picture below of all this snow and then some space where you can see there was a car parked. That spot was taken by a patient that had an appointment right when we opened at 7 am. He came in and was done with his appointment within 15 minutes. He walked out the door and I didn't think anything of it. I heard a car alarm a few times... but it's a normal noise to hear in a busy place and again, didn't think anything of it. 

Almost two hours later... I looked out because I could hear the alarm again. This poor kid was sitting in his car and every time he would go to open his door or start the car, the alarm would sound. I went outside to see if he was okay. I had experienced something similar with my car before, ha ha. I told him to get out, lock the door with the key, and then unlock it with the key again. He looked at me like I was crazy and a face of, "This is not going to work you crazy lady." Then he did as I said, opened the door, and to his surprise, no alarm! Ha ha. His face was HYSTERICAL. It was a face of disbelief that he had just sat there for two whole hours when there was such a simple solution. 

He thanked me and drove away. I couldn't help but chuckle a little and be glad I had finally gone out to see what was going on. I feel like this situation is a lot like life. Sometimes we feel as if we're stuck and have no idea how to get out of the situation we're in. If we can learn to just take a deep breath, ask those around us for a little help (and of course our Father in heaven) we can get a new perspective and get ourselves out of whatever situation we may be in. 

A Little Break

Tonight I took a little break off of school and Jackson and I went to dinner. It was definitely nice to actually see him at night. We got a great deal at Texas Roadhouse. It was delicious! That night we just spent together. Jackson is so patient with me. As I was changing into my pajamas, I threw my sock at him and it landed perfectly on top of his head, ha ha. He didn't even get mad at me. What a good soul he is. I'm lucky to have him. 

The Beginning of Another Week

Here we are, it's Monday again. I'd love to say I am one of those people that look forward to Mondays... but I truly dread them. For this reason, I am always looking for things to cheer me up each Monday. Jackson was sweet enough to send me this snap. Little things like that really do mean the world to me. I have been decorating a little more as well and asked my sister for a few new pictures of the twins. She sent me these adorable ones of when they were first born. SO CUTE. Monday night at school is always theory night, so we don't take any appointments. Tonight, I worked on color and chemistry. We got to do this fun little experiment to learn more about reactions. As I got home I said to myself, "Good work. You made it through another Monday."

     

Selfies

This post might be a little awkward... ha ha. Nevertheless, I hope I can get across my main point since it's something that has seemed to help me. This is a selfie I took last Sunday. Usually I don't take selfies like this... and usually I definitely don't share them. However, I had gotten a new lip color, actually taken time to get ready, and wanted to send Jackson a cute snap chat. ;) All joking aside though, I sometimes really struggle with self confidence. Sometimes it can be so easy to love those around you but pick yourself apart to the extreme. Almost all of us could always be a little more or something. A little taller, more in shape, more organized, etc. True, we will always have flaws. We're human. In my eyes though, those flaws make us perfect. I have been trying to love myself for who I am. I am trying to appreciate the person I am today and continue to better myself tomorrow. So here's a challenge... take a selfie. Then take a good look, and think of one thing you like about yourself. You'll be amazed how it can change your perspective. 

A Little Change

We are going to be switching offices at work. It will be in the same building, just a different office. Change is always such a bittersweet thing for me. Usually I am excited but sometimes anxious. I always dislike the in-between stage though. I like being settled in one place or the other... but the middle ground always makes me crazy, ha ha. Change is good though. Without change, there is no growth. They finished painting today. We should be moving in within the next couple weeks. On the plus side, I really love the smell of new paint. I think it's going to look pretty good when it's all finished. 

My Brother Michael

To be honest, going into this post I feel intimidated. There is so much to express and I stress about what is the right way to get it across and also hope that I don't leave out anything important. So I am just going to go for it and hope that it can be felt from the heart. 

My siblings and family mean the world to me. I have a special and close relationship with all of them. When it comes to my brother, I had a pretty close relationship with him because we are the closest in age. It also meant we fought ALL THE TIME, ha ha. My poor parents that had to put up with us... and other siblings for that matter. Even though we were always driving each other crazy, it was still so fun to do all the crazy things we did as kids. For example: Shooting a hornets nest with water guns. (His bright idea.) Paint balling. Adventuring in the fields. Skate parks. Playing with Dipper. Hunting. Fishing. Going to school. Building Snowmen. Mario Kart. Vacations. Basketball Games. The list goes on and on... But one night, something happened that would change all of that forever. 

I was at my friend Jyllian's house when my older sister Amanda came to the door. It was weird because it was a Saturday night and it wasn't time to go home yet. I got to the door and she had a certain look on her face. She told me we had to go right then, that my brother Michael had been hurt. As we drove back to my house, I asked what happened. She told me she wasn't sure, she just knew it was bad and that we needed to get home so my mom could tell us everything. A few steps into the door, I saw my mom standing there sobbing uncontrollably. I asked what had happened. I found out that my brother had been in a gun accident and had passed away. I dropped to my knees. I remember screaming no over and over and over again. Even though I was screaming at the top of my lungs, it was as if I couldn't hear a thing. All I could think about was Michael and the fact that in this life time, I would never see him again. It ripped, broke, and shattered my heart more than I ever thought was possible. The days following were all a fog. I didn't care to eat, sleep, or do anything for that matter except for be with my family. I mourned to have him there with us. I felt as if I would never be happy again. I would never smile again.

 Time continued to pass whether I liked it or not. Although it ached, life kept going no matter how much I willed it to stop. The hole that was made that day never went away. Yes, it is healed around the edges, no longer raw... but no matter how much time passes, it will always be there... and to me, that is okay. I know nothing can or should fill it. Over time though, I started to feel him there. Although I couldn't see him, I knew he was there. It's hard to explain if  you've never experienced it before.

 As I paid really close attention and listened carefully to the things that were whispered to my heart, I began to see it was all part of God's plan. Even if I didn't like it or understand it, things were happening how they were meant to. I began to change as well. For the better. I understood better how valuable life is. I gained a stronger testimony of the fact that we CAN be with our loved ones forever. I treated people more kindly. I saw this world in a different light. Days turned into weeks, weeks into months, and months into years. 9 years today to be exact since my brother Michael passed. 

Although a lot of time has gone by, I still have days that those edges are raw. I yearn to have him there on days like my wedding, graduation, etc. I wish to talk to him for just a few minutes to see where he is and what he is doing... but I know that even after all this time, he is still here. He still watches over my family and I. When I do stupid things like trip over my shoe, I still hear him laughing from above. He is still my crazy, obnoxious, bighearted,  6 ft. 5 in. big lurchy, athletic, witty, sarcastic, hardworking, loving older brother. He always will be. I have learned and grown so much from both what he taught me during his 16 years here on this earth and from his 9 years as my angel. One of my favorite lines from his obituary was, "He lived life the same way he played, above the rim." Even though I'm always a foot shorter and a few steps behind him, I strive to live the same way. I love ya buddy. I can't wait to see you again one day. 

Love, your obnoxious little sister, Jenny.

My brother, Michael.

The fields behind my dad's house where we used to go on walks with our black lab, Dipper. 

Dipper. The best dog ever.

Michael's boots. Even after he passed, I still walk in his footsteps. 

Happy Birthday Amy!

Today was Amy's birthday. I don't think I'll ever be able to fully thank her for all of it. I look up to her in a lot of ways and have learned a lot from her. We went over and visited her tonight. Jackson got her a pretty funny birthday card. It made us all laugh. I hope it was a great day. Happy Birthday Amy! 

Inside it said... (That's from Shakespeare I think.) - Happy Birthday

Getting Through Monday

Let's be honest, we all know Monday can be the beast of all beasts. At least for me. With all the memes I see about Monday on social media, I feel there has to be at least a handful of people that agree with me, ha ha. However, this Monday was a little different. Even though waking up was rough and work was work, there were a couple bright moments throughout the day. I wanted to share a few of those. First, my sister Heather sent me this picture of Hadley that is absolutely the CUTEST thing EVER. I set it as my background on my phone so that as I'm going through my hard moments,  I can take a look at it and without fail, it makes me smile every time.

My second moment came when  I found a link on the "Remembering Annie Schmidt" Facebook page. She is the daughter of Jon Schmidt who is famous for his piano skills and group the "Piano Guys." She went missing in Oregon and they eventually found her where she had fallen while hiking. You will have to read the story. It's so heartbreaking. The last thing that Annie posted on social media before passing was, " Fill your life with good vibes." I have had strong connection to her whole story. So when on her page I found a link to a sweatshirt someone had made in her memory, I couldn't help but get one. With losing loved ones myself, being in life-threatening moments more than once, and seeing the world around me I know we never know which moment is our last. So in Annie's words, "Fill your life with good vibes."

Doesn't the smile just absolutely kill you? Ha ha.